The dangers of Koi Birth

Some of you may be aware of the new fad in birthing made popular by a woman we’ll call Jane.  I’d like to take a moment to tell you why you SHOULD NOT HAVE YOUR BABY IN A KOI POND. 

This trend was made popular from the original fad of “water birth” which began in 1998.  It is the practice of vaginally delivering your fetus in water. One woman has even had a C-section in water with the help of some ice and her Doula. There are no studies that say that water birthing is safe at all– in fact, water birth in and of itself is a dangerous practice because humans cannot breathe underwater.  The FDA is working on this serious problem by trying to ban birthing tubs, thank the Lord.  But in the meantime we’ll have to pray that all babies born under this practice are safe in God’s hands. 
Water birth often goes hand in hand with Lotus Birth. The practice of carrying your placenta around in an ice cream dish for 7 days.


From this, we heard about the sickening practice of birthing in the Ocean with Dolphins, I am sure you can find stopdolphinbirth blogs as well if you are so inclined.  But today folks, I am here to talk about the extreme practice of Koi Birth.
This practice became popular because of tatoos.  People thought it would be “cool” to birth with them, since they enjoy permentantly scarring their bodies with drawings of them.

 Let’s start with why this is bad for the fish

In order to birth with Koi, you’d either have to make it dangerously hot for the fish, or dangerously cold for the fetus.  Koi are cold-water fish, but benefit from being kept in the 15-25 degrees C (59-77 degrees F).  Human feti, on the other hand must be birthed in temperatures upwards of 110 degrees F.  That’s hotter than a hot tub, folks.  This doesn’t add up!  Therefore, if we heated a koi pond to 110 degrees F, the fish would quickly get overheated which causes them to become lethargic and defecate in the water.  If the fish inhale their defecation it gives them diarrhea and if they inhale the diarrhea they will become the color of poop. As you can imagine, this detracts from their beauty. 

Koi also have long life spans and one of the longest term memories in the animal kingdom.  This is probably why people tattoo them on their bodies.  After birthing with koi there have been reports of sadness and loss of appetite in the fish, due to post traumatic stress disorder.  There are only 3 Koi Therapists with any experience in post traumatic stress disorder from koi birthing in the entire world and it is VERY difficult to find an appointment. 

Now we can discuss the effects on the child. 

Koi fish are well known for being covered in Amino Acids, in particular, L-Glutamine.  The precursor to sugar.  When Koi are under stress due to seeing vagina or being in hot water they release amino acids in dangerously high amounts.  At this point the water is filled with diarhea and sugar.  Sugar Aminos in high amounts can make the infant hyperactive and we have no idea how long these effects can last.  A day or a lifetime.  Koi fish are omniverous, especially liking baby meat when under stress (emotional eating effects Koi as well) and have a mouth 20 cm in diameter.  They will often use their mouth like a vacuum extractor on the infants head and suck it straight from the mothers vaginal opening into their own mouth and eat the baby. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, I implore you to do your research heavily on this topic before deciding to embark on this type of journey. 

If you’re looking for a safer alternative to Koi Birth, I suggest you check out Coyote Birthing or Eagle Birthing.  These practices are not only safe, but they’re a beautiful site to behold.  If you’d like more information on coyote Birthing or Eagle Birthing please email me at